Party pooper

I went to a bridal shower this weekend for my friend J (Hi, J! See, I'm blogging again, just for you!), who did two brilliant things: (1) knew about her bridal shower in advance so she didn't spend the whole time trying to calm down and get over the near-coronary she experienced on walking through the door; and (2) had a say in the location of the shower, a restaurant with a bountiful salad bar. I love me a good salad bar, even though I know they're not especially sanitary, and I think my love of salad bar's will not transfer to the Vegas buffets that I encounter later this week.

Anyway, one of the gifts that I gave was a duplicate. I still don't understand why there are inevitably problems with gift registries; it seems like it should be fairly straightforward. And I secretly think it's a good thing to have duplicates, because although it's annoying to have to schlep returns to the store, it's fun to have free money for housewares (or a rifle).

So my gift was one of the few duplicates at this shower, which is starting to be a trend with me. Last month, for M's baby shower, I gave one of four baby monitors. And, you know, with the second one, you can pull the, "Oh, no problem, one for grandma's house!" And even the third: "The other grandparents' house!" But four is ridiculous.

At M's shower, I had actually attached the gift receipt, and told her so; at J's, I hadn't included it but did keep it, and told her so. And both of them responded identically: "Oh, no -- I'm going to keep yours and return the other."

I don't know why that strikes me funny; I appreciate that they're being polite, and that that's their knee-jerk response. But, really, I already know that you like the gift I gave you; you picked it out. So I don't actually feel bad, at all, if it's mine you're returning, rather than someone else's. Buy yourself something else fun, or buy yourself some bedding if it's a bridal shower, and some nursing equipment if it's a baby shower, because those are the most uncomfortable thank-you notes to write, so sometimes better to buy them for yourself.

The other trend that I need to disclose to J: at the last two bachelorette parties I attended, the bride-to-be became violently ill. Not enough of a track record, I don't think, to exclude me from the list, but definitely enough not to plan around me, and to hope secretly that I'm not able to make it, just in case.