Undue influence
Because I'm a huge procrasinator, I didn't until yesterday go shopping for a birthday present for my nephew, who turns eight today.
The other challenge with this particular nephew -- my oldest, and the only of my siblings' kids who's an only child -- is that I don't like the things he likes. I ask what my other nieces and nephews want for their birthdays, and I'm told books (my favorite things to get) and puzzles and maybe some crafts or something sports- or music-related. With this nephew? Star Wars, light sabers, war games. Which I just can't abide. My sister has a no-Simpsons policy in her house, to which I also object, but respect, but I have a personal no-weapons policy, and I worry that the Star Wars thing just makes my nephew a big dork, so I really struggle when it comes to birthdays for him.
At what point do I just suck it up and give him what he likes, despite my objections? Don't I have some responsibility as his aunt at least to try to be a good influence? I wanted to get him some good music, or some fun t-shirts, or even some books -- which, ironically, he hates, even though at his age, his mother had to be FORCED to go play outside because she'd a million times prefer to have her nose in a book -- so he'll at least be well-read, even if he's not cool.
But I'd be pretty annoyed if my siblings or my friends started giving me stuff they know I hate, just because it's "good for me" or because it's good for who they'd prefer I be. But part of me just feels like there's still a window of opportunity for my nephew, maybe until he's like 10 or so?
I don't know. I ended up getting him the first Harry Potter book and two board games, neither of which was Star Wars-related. I expect that he'll open them, go "huh," and sort of toss them aside, but part of me hopes that he'll find something in there that he loves, and that one day he'll thank me for introducing him to some cool new stuff. But I'm not holding my breath, and for Christmas my sister suggested a Star Wars backpack, and I may just have to give in.
The other challenge with this particular nephew -- my oldest, and the only of my siblings' kids who's an only child -- is that I don't like the things he likes. I ask what my other nieces and nephews want for their birthdays, and I'm told books (my favorite things to get) and puzzles and maybe some crafts or something sports- or music-related. With this nephew? Star Wars, light sabers, war games. Which I just can't abide. My sister has a no-Simpsons policy in her house, to which I also object, but respect, but I have a personal no-weapons policy, and I worry that the Star Wars thing just makes my nephew a big dork, so I really struggle when it comes to birthdays for him.
At what point do I just suck it up and give him what he likes, despite my objections? Don't I have some responsibility as his aunt at least to try to be a good influence? I wanted to get him some good music, or some fun t-shirts, or even some books -- which, ironically, he hates, even though at his age, his mother had to be FORCED to go play outside because she'd a million times prefer to have her nose in a book -- so he'll at least be well-read, even if he's not cool.
But I'd be pretty annoyed if my siblings or my friends started giving me stuff they know I hate, just because it's "good for me" or because it's good for who they'd prefer I be. But part of me just feels like there's still a window of opportunity for my nephew, maybe until he's like 10 or so?
I don't know. I ended up getting him the first Harry Potter book and two board games, neither of which was Star Wars-related. I expect that he'll open them, go "huh," and sort of toss them aside, but part of me hopes that he'll find something in there that he loves, and that one day he'll thank me for introducing him to some cool new stuff. But I'm not holding my breath, and for Christmas my sister suggested a Star Wars backpack, and I may just have to give in.
1 Comments:
As expected, our gifts were not the most popular yesterday. My sister seemed very excited about the book, but my nephew said, "Oh, Harry Potter" and tossed it aside. And apparently (I was in the other room), when he opened the football game, which I thought was kind of cool for an 8-year-old boy, he said, "What does it DO?"
And here, I guess, is my clearest evidence of the generation gap, because when I was 8, games by definition didn't "do" anything -- you did things to them or with them.
I've officially decided I'd rather be popular than right on this one, and will go the Star Wars -- or whatever the latest thing is -- route for Christmas.
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tangentwoman, at 11:51 AM
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